We Think Being Vulnerable Is Weakness
The choice to love is the most important choice of our lives. Love is the only reason we have incarnated. However, none of us know what “to love” actually means. We spend countless hours “protecting” ourselves, feeling we find strength in our defense. We have erroneously assumed that when we love, we have made ourselves vulnerable.
As I navigate my path, I receive a lot of interesting advice. Most of it involves power, strength, and getting even – a “don’t let the bastards get you down” attitude. The advice is rarely centered on keeping the communication open, being kind, and loving people as they are. We run away, cancel accounts, quit jobs, get divorced, and defriend people thinking we are “honoring” ourselves. But if our purpose is to love, then how do these actions help heal us?
Some will counter with, “well, I must own my space,” and even some might amusingly say, “I must stand in my power.” “Power” is another word that we do not understand. If we want to talk about power, our conversation will rest upon love – the very thing we so guardedly dole out. The gauge of our strength is our ability to honor ourselves as we are and discard who we pretend to be. Infinite power comes as we admit to our little secrets, our gnawing addictions, and let go of the need to be right. We stand naked before ourselves, realizing it is our perception that can heal us.
“If you were one with God and recognized this oneness, you would know His power is yours.”A Course in Miracles
We Like To Avoid Pain.
So, as we grapple with our pain avoidance behavior, we cut people off, thinking that is the end of the story. We believe that communication is done through words, but most of our connections are made through the mind. Anyone who has had a session with me has experienced the miracle of when two minds join. We are always in a relationship with everyone in our life regardless of when we had our last contact.
“This is the function of your holy relationship. For what one thinks, the other will experience with him.”A Course in Miracles
We Must Lean In Not Turn Away
People get in trouble, make bad choices, end up in prison or strung out. How far off is that from our own desperate moments? Society offers advice based on how to look away instead of how to lean in. This is how we have been trained and molded to fit in. However, if we love ourselves and have developed a loving relationship with a higher power, what space is there for the pain to dwell? If we genuinely want a different life or crave more abundance, we must question everything we do to fit in and cope.
We must be open to a higher resonance – a spiritual direction. No matter where our mind wanders off, being more joyful will always come back to the strength of our relationship with the Divine.
That sacred connection will then radiate through us with little effort. At that point, loving becomes natural and effortless. The depth of our joy will never be found in other people or things. Instead of numbing ourselves, power is found in our ability to feel. We offer those feelings to God. We then receive direction. Our ability to be open to that healing will then determine what happens next.
“When you have looked upon your brother with complete forgiveness, from which no error is excluded and nothing kept hidden what mistake can there be anywhere you cannot overlook?……This is your part in bringing peace. For you have asked what is your function here, and have been answered. Seek not to change it, nor to substitute another goal. This one was given you, and only this.”A Course in Miracles